I am having.......

A BOY!! Declan David... I have to admit, I was a little disappointed at first, but I am just so happy he's healthy!! I look at Aidan's pics when he was a newborn and I can't help but get excited like I was with Aidan! I can't wait to see who he looks like, how his personality is, if he has lots of hair, if he sucks his thumb or takes a pacifier...etc! After the ultrasound he wouldn't settle down! He kept kicking and moving around. He has calmed down today, and I laugh at the personality he seems to have so far! He is like his mommy!! I get pissed and hyper, but then I calm down and it doesn't bother me anymore. Aidan and Chad want revenge,lol! Aidan hardly ever stopped moving when he started and Declan seems to take breaks! I love this!! I say I don't want to have anymore, but I am learning to love the differences between pregnancies and I can't wait to see how different (or the same) my boys are going to be! Maybe there will be another.........

Just an update

I hadn't realized it had been almost a month since my last post! Not that anyone reads this but me, but I have had lots of things go on! I will start off with we found out that it is a 75% chance that we are having a niece! Yay! She is tentatively Zoey Brook and I hope it stays that name, mainly because it is different without being just plain weird! It just seems to fit my bro in law and sister in law. I couldn't see them with a traditional named kid. We find out if it's Abby or Declan on Monday! I cannot wait! Woohoooooo! Anyways- my preg is going pretty much the same as last month. I am still puking every so often and my face is still gross. The only difference is that my glasses broke and with Christmas coming up, we really don't have an extra couple hundred bucks for a new pair. My contacts are fitting better, so that's a plus! I also quit my job, so I have no real need to go out in public too often wearing my broken glasses. I am so freakin happy to be out of that job! Ok- my son actually wants to snuggle, so peace out till Monday!!!

Don't know what ya got til it's gone!

Alright! I am back on my laptop! My stupid power cord broke for the 3rd time, so I had to ebay a new one. It arrived yesterday!! Yay!!! I swear, I am so freakin happy, I would totally kiss the ass of the person who invented ebay! Anyway- I have been progressing wonderfully with my preggo-ness....ha! I have actually been throwing up everyday (today it was broccoli and cheese soup-yum, huh?), my eczema is going crazy, I have headaches and heartburn and I have acne worse than the kid who bags groceries at the Food Lion. Oh- and I haven't been able to wear my contacts, so I feel like a fat, bitchy, nerdy 11 year old again! All I have to say is this baby better make lots of money when it grows up and buy me whatever the fuck I want!! Sure- with my luck, this child will be like Britney Spears.......We find out the gender of the baby on Dec. 17- if it's a boy, we have picked out Declan David (Declan is gaelic for "full of goodness") and if it's a girl, Abigail Cecelia which means a father's joy in Hebrew. I am not fully sold on Abigail, but we still have time! The middle names are after my uncle David and my aunt Cis. I will keep you updated!!! Peace........

Sooo bitchy today!!

My day has been really sucky! First, I have had a damn headache since Weds night that won't go away! So I left work early Thurs morn and called in this morning, which I am sure will be the reason for the dirty looks at work on Monday, which I don't REALLY give a fuck. Then, I take my son to Mc D's for lunch b/c he has a DRs appt at 1 and I wanted to be a nice mommy. The manager was being nice (weird, but nice) and gave him a free ice cream cone, which my son promply spilled all over his shirt and pants. I had to run home and get clean clothes, which, thankfully didn't make me too late to his appt. His appt was fine until he had to get 4 shots. He screamed "Don't do that to me again!!" over and over. That was a bit stressful! Then, on the way to my appt, traffic was backed up on the interstate, making us 30 min late. We got up there and the beotch at the desk was like "I just cancelled your appt. And I ain't heard of no traffic backed up", I looked at her, holding my gallon of fresh urine I painstakingly collected over the last 24 hours, and said "Well, I left you a message on Audix (or whatever the fuck it's called)", then she looked at me and sighed (yep,she fucking sighed) "Well, let me call them and see if they can take you". By this time I was so pissed I was almost in tears, only cuz it would be inappropriate for a pregnant woman to jump over the desk and beat the shit out of this unhappy middle-aged woman with bad grammar, facial moles, and a mustache. Finally this nurse comes out from the back and was like, "Just go on back, honey". Take that, appointment Nazi! Anyways, in the appt, my DR was being bitchy, too, but by this time I was so done with it, I just let it go. Except....we brought our 4 yr-old son to the appt with us specifically to see an ultrasound pic of the baby, which they apparently forgot to order at my last appt. I talked my DR into doing a shitty US, just so my son could see it.He did and didn't see crap, but I did some deep breathing and all was well. Then, the day actually went uphill from there: My hub took me shopping and -gasp!- bought me shoes! Without complaining about the price! That alone was worth my day! Until we came home and my mother-in-law had her teeth out and insisted on talking non-stop.......but I'll leave that for another time.......sigh...

I AM PREGNANT!!

Yes- it's true! We have been trying and now it is happening!! I am due in May, but I will be having the baby in April because of a stupid disease called diabetes. I have been dealing with this disease for 6 yrs so I am pretty much used to it. This is my second pregnancy with diabetes and my son, who is 4 now, was a very healthy 9lbs 2oz. Not too terribly big, but he was born at 38 weeks (2 wks early), so he could have been ALOT bigger! I am hoping for a girl this time, but I would be just as happy with a healthy boy. I had an ultrasound at my first doctor's appointment and we were able to see the heartbeat. I was 7 weeks then, on September 17. My next appt is on Friday the 28th, I will be almost 9 weeks and we get another ultrasound! More on Friday.........

My Man..........

Ok- so I am taking a cue from my BFJ and dedicated a blog to my husband, Chad......
~LOVING HIM~
~I love the way he knows how to piss me off, then make it all okay by INSISTING I give him a kiss
~I love the way he can read my mind- he always knows to send me a text saying I love you at the moment I am feeling like giving up!
~I love how he has been the one to make our marriage work by not giving up when all was lost
~I love how much I need him to make my life complete
~I love how we have stupid inside jokes that no one else understands or even cares about (chicken and eggs)
~I love how committed he is to his beliefs
~I love when he looks into my eyes and calls me a "poopface"
~I love when he gives me 2 cards for every special occasion, a funny one and a serious one
~I love how he sings to me
~I love how he thinks I look sexy in a white bra and white cotton panties
~I love how I still get all hot and bothered when he takes off his glasses
~I even love (don't get too excited) when he plays World of Warcraft in his undies
~Most of all, I love that I can't wait for more children with him, then grandchildren, then our retirement........
~I love you,baby!! Happy 5 year Anniversary (July 27)! Here's to many more!!~
~

A Beautiful Crossroads.....

I am not the type of Christian to "testify" or "witness". I am a quiet, reverent Catholic, for God's sake! I do work at a daycare called King's Kids, which is directly affiliated with The Chapel of the Holy Spirit and WKCL 91.5 FM, "Where We KNOW Christ Lives"......But I am at a point in my life to where I need to understand the end of life and the Faith I have been taught. I want Aidan to understand that God IS a vengeful God, but He DOES forgive!! I have cuts on my body that I put there because I was not ready to forgive myself for the sins of others. I am ready to do that now. The struggle I have within myself is mine and His, and I KNOW He was only waiting for me to acknowledge the strength He gave me. I have been reading the Bible and trying to identify His word. I took the advice of another person and started to read Proverbs, a chapter per day (31 chap.=31 days of the month). I needed to have God's spirit in me to overcome all other wants. Yes, I DO still drink alcohol, but I feel that His Word guides me to always serve my husband and my son (even my Mother and Father- whom I forgive for reasons I cannot publish). I am not illustrating a "bible beater" existence! I read the Bible for years and tried to "get" the fulfillment I needed. Life has evolved to where we as Christians need to live according to the Word as it applies to OUR lives. The 10 Commandments are a wonderful guide to our lives and the happiness we can gather from them. Reality is something we all have to live in, however, the things we innately know that are wrong are the things we need to stay away from, whatsoever our beliefs. My personal belief is that God has a plan for all of us! It may bite the big one while we are experiencing it, but there WILL be a day when it is all clarified for you! Forgiveness becomes as ordinary as breathing and mortal sin becomes a PAST transgression to which you KNOW all is forgiven, because it is something you will never even think of to do again and you have peace..........I wish you all peace, forgiveness and understanding!

Well- I am not pregnant. The blood test came back today and it was negative. I am ok about it, though! I don't think I would have gotten soooo worked up in the first place if my period wasn't so late!! It is still not here- 3 weeks and counting....I AM ready for a new baby, especially since my "baby" turned 4 yesterday! And, we got some very good advice from someone we both respect. We have some things to finish working out in our relationship and his advice was to just let God guide us. God knows what is truly in our hearts and I really believe He has a plan for us. We will continue our family when it is time. Thanks to all who is keeping us in their thoughts!! Til next time!!

Well- I am NOW waiting on a blood test to tell me if I am preggo.....Hopefully I will find out on Monday............

Hmmm...

I am a little worried. I have all the symptoms of being preggo, but the tests say I am not. I have a dr's appointment on Thurs with a general practitioner b/c my gyno's office is freakin booked until July 24th!! That's a little fucked up, to me anyways! I called last week when I was a week late, they told me to wait until I was 2 weeks late, take another test, then call them if it still said negative. I did. And now I am supposed to wait 2 MORE weeks!! Honestly- something is not right here and they want me to wait longer?!? I guess that's the end of that relationship! I am also diabetic and I do take some meds that are not good for pregnant women. Apparently that is not as important to them as it is to me and my husband! We WANT another child and I don't want to jeopardize my health and our child's. So, please keep us in mind these next few days while we find out what the hell is up!! Update on Thurs!!

Just sayin'.......

~QUIXOTIC~ this was copied out of Merriam-Webster..........



quix·ot·ic
Pronunciation: kwik-'sä-tik
Function: adjective
Etymology: Don Quixote
1 : foolishly impractical especially in the pursuit of ideals; especially : marked by rash lofty romantic ideas or extravagantly chivalrous action
2 : CAPRICIOUS, UNPREDICTABLE
synonym see IMAGINARY
- quix·ot·i·cal /-ti-k&l/ adjective
- quix·ot·i·cal·ly /-ti-k(&-)lE/ adverb

ALWAYS better when you talk!!

Ok- so if anyone cares, I am doing a little update on my last blog! For anyone who reads this and doesn't know, this is my public diary of sorts. If I am happy, sad, pissed, quixotic (I just like that word) or whatever, I am going to write it and if someone may be offended or have questions, pls ASK me!! That being said, I had a soul cleansing talk with my BFJ. It was all about stupid misunderstandings and being hormonal and stressed, so I went a little off the deep-end! I am lucky that she knows me well and allowed me to apologize. We both have busy lives and are very bad about returning or making calls, so we have made a pact to talk at least once a week, NO MATTER WHAT-right, J -lol!!! It's getting harder and harder to know who to trust and who not to, and I am glad I have a friend that I know I can talk to if I am feeling a little off-center! Thanks, Toots ;)!! Also- just a word to the wise, if it has nothing to do with you, KEEP OUT!! This just goes out to anyone, no one in particular, who like to butt into other people's relationships. I know too many people who talk shit, and also too many people who don't know when to shut the fuck up about what they've heard! Life is too short for all that bs! So, um, look before you leap and don't count your chickens before they hatch and one in the hand is worth two in the bush and two heads are better than one and many hands make light work and two wrongs don't make a right (ok-is that enough words for the wise?....)

"friends"

I think this title sums it up. I am slightly confused right at this moment about someone I considered a great friend (not talking about you, BFG-lol!) who won't answer my phone calls and hasn't called me back. She is someone I care about in great detail and I am feeling hurt, especially when someone else asked me if we are fighting. I mean what the fuck?? I am way too old for this shit to bother me, but it still does! This is not the first time we have had a misunderstanding and I would HOPE she realized that it always gets better after we talk about it. I guess not! I am not sure I can take this kind of friendship anymore- don't gush to me about how you miss me and we need to hang out more, then ignore me and act like I did something wrong when I haven't! I am very mad right now but I don't want to dwell on it, mainly b/c I am in the dark and I don't want to feel any worse about this than I do. Should I get out of this so-called friendship?????????

The 9........

If you watch the news, you know of the 9 men who died while fighting a fire in Charleston, SC. You know it was in a furniture store and all who died were firefighters. The thing that touches me, personally, is that my future brother-in-law is now a firefighter, as is his brother and many of his close friends. They are all in various City of Charleston bases and a few were helping their fellow brothers, and all are home safe. My husband is a Paramedic for Chas. County, and while all this was going on, he was working at his other job (same type of work, but at a private company). My future bro-in-law just started his job and is waiting to do shift-work. I am selfishly thankful that they both were not there, however I have been married to this type of work for long enough to know that every single firefighter/emt/medic goes into their job knowing what may happen and they love what they do! Each and every person in this type of profession, whether they be mothers, fathers, husbands or wives, understand that they might not come home. It doesn't make it easier on the ones they leave every morning, but speaking from experience, I am DAMN PROUD of EVERY SINGLE FIREFIGHTER/EMT I have EVER known! IF any of my family were to die in the line of duty, I would be heartbroken, but I would find comfort in the fact that they made some one's life a little longer, saved some one's child, or husband/wife/mother/father...etc, and they LOVED doing it! To all families touched by this tragedy, remember why you were (and are) proud of them--throughout all the years of being awoken by the tones of an emergency call at 3am on their volunteer radios, or when they had to cover another person's shift-after their own 24, or when they missed your best friend's wedding or whatever....-- they are the brave men and women we turn to for help. I will never forget..........

Me in a nutshell, with lot's of ramblin' -revised edition

Hi out there! I created this blog b/c I have a consummate need to talk about myself! So-I will go ahead with the intros.... My name is Beth, I am a 27 year-old wife and mother.... A pre-school teacher with a dirty mouth as soon as I clock out...I love to smoke cigarettes, drink beer, take random but creatively made alcoholic shots and sleep the days away.... I consider myself fat, but I am pretty confident in my looks... I am half Mexican and half Irish....I have depression and take meds for it...I love to listen to any type of music-my fave is classic rock and I love me some Led Zeppelin (Ramblin' On..).....I am my parent's heartbreak and also their comedic relief.....I have two sisters whom I consider my best-friends, yet my worst enemies (middle-child syndrome)...I am obsessive compulsive when it comes to: American Idol, color placement, and dirty ashtrays...I love real-life crime stories....I get sick at the thought of child abuse (physical, emotional, or sexual)...I am honest unless you judge me-then I will lie my ass off to you...my nicknames are: Beef, Bethie,Beth Ann and Chicken Legs...I love my family, but also hate them at random times for petty reasons...I am diabetic...I love purses or handbags of all shapes and sizes...I am addicted to energy drinks...I am left-handed and convinced this is the reason for my insanity...I can speed-read and also give a complete synopsis of the book I have read...I like to watch stand-up comedy...I hate people who judge others, and think it's ok to do so...I have a BFG, a BFJ and a BFD
OK- I think that's it! I will be writing this blog whenever I feel like it- which could be daily, weekly or monthly! Oh- please, if you comment on anything I write-DO A SPELL-CHECK!!! I hate reading shit when someone can't spell!